Much to Ponder (Eideen)

[neopanther]

P’nset paced his weyr. Their return home had offered him only much – much more to be deliberated upon. M’tani’s portrait hanging in the Council chambers. Right above the head seat, pride of place. The weathered old leader of Telgar’s image was one they would never escape. Glorious frame holding an image painted to a perfect likeness. Yes, P’nset thought him a good man, but he was hardly worthy of that. It would have been likely just as likely to put a picture of the beaming G’tet there. But then that would horrify and astound P’nset more.

As one would guess, G’tet seemed to still be getting on very well with Aleda. This worried him slight amounts. For one, she was a Caminar. She was no rider. G’tet... was rather stand-offish. At least in P’nset’s opinions, actions now, think later sort. And in a Caminar-rider affair, such things would likely not contest to time. But then P’nset never understood green rider.

Well. Male green riders. Now there was an entirely different problem. female green riders. Faranth forbid, but somewhere in the wisdom of Pern, nature had decided to go along and change an inherent rule of dragon legacy. Girls on the gold, all others to the men. Women simply were not made for the wear and tear that it forced upon the body. They were too frail. To emotionally attatched – especially for a green, whose rising habits would have them upon their last frantic nerve within a turn. If they were moral about it.

And what’s more. The only graduated female green rider, was in his wing. Well, it was his wing in bereft of a Wingleader, he could call it that. Though he doubted J’fel would waste much more time before allocating them a bronze rider. He was but a wingsecond, and he could not escape that. Neither did he want to.

Pern had changed, he just had a void like feeling in the pit of his gut, that this was not the l ast off the changes he was going to see Pern adhere to.

[Eideen]

As if by his thought on greens alone, Daikalveth's wings battered the air outside the brownrider's weyr. Long claws scored deeply on stone and soon the green folded wings and settled on the ledge. Her rider slid down and once again removed her cap to let long, dark hair sweep behind her. No announcements, no thoughts sent ahead. P'nset could have been in his unmentionables, for all she could have cared, when she entered his weyr and went about doing something rather strange.

Her jacket went first, shucked off near the wall near the outside of the Weyr, and then her boots. Her face was broken with a grin too wide to be merely friendly and, barefoot, she trotted toward him with arms outstretched. Did she really mean to hug the man?

"You! What am I going to do with you. You're a terrible influence on me sometimes, playing games in front of new people. You had me worried there, for a bit." Her laughing joy was surely.. well, probably not what he would have expected.

Perhaps, with the distraction of her arrival, the small changes to his weyr would have gone missed. An extra chest, messily shoved against a wall with several garments that looked more like they'd fit a woman, and not him. Another armchair, beat up and well-loved. A few more blankets and pillows than he would have remembered leaving behind.

[neopanther]

Her acclamation caught him totally off guard; he almost reached for his belt knife. “Oh, it’s you.” He muttered before turning to face her properly, resting his backside against a rather worn chair that had mysteriously joined the single one had had before leaving. Well the weyr-staff must have been feeling kind – or someone moved out and left it behind, thus it went to him. No real surprise.
He turned on a somewhat regular facade, “Yes, yes, don’t worry, I was only messing.”He said, in a poor attempt at echoing her jovial demeanour. He didn’t do upbeat well, if at all actually. Yet she seemed to think he did.
“Sorry, Eideen the trip was pretty... unusual.” He searched for the words. Pernese was a difficult tongue sometimes, the Noestecan language sometimes had such better and more appropriate terms for certain things, or emotions, that the pernese did not. “But I don’t want to discuss that, How has Frost been in my absence? Did J’fel’s ‘Second take good care of you all?” He asked, returning to general wing areas which he knew she would agree with him upon. He was rather unnerved by the fact that she had just arrived into his weyr though, were they on such familiar terms that Daikalveth did no longer announce her or her rider’s presence? Well no matter what – he had no choice but to play along in this charade. It was what had happened, and the Weyr knew not of their distortion off time – quite obviously it had had a greater impact than they would have thought. He would rather like to discover how his history of time now differed to that of todays’. But that would be almost impossible in t he current state of things. He would just have to accept it.

[Eideen]

She heard him, certainly, but talk of wings seemed less important than her closing the gap that stood between them. Hands planted on the man's face and her head canted to the side. It was such a swift thing he would not have had much time to avoid it, let alone respond either in kind or otherwise. Her lips stole a quick, chirped kiss from him before she turned and started.. arranging things.

"Wing's been fine. J'fel's second did all right, but he's no you. Then again, I may be biased." She laughed again, and flopped comfortably into the chair opposite him, bare feet curled toes into the fur of a rug that took up space on the floor between the chairs.

"Oh, I did you a favor, by the way. Your other set of leathers had a few holes, so I dropped them off with the seamstresses. Said they'd have them back to you before too long. Not that you'll need them right away. Been gone so long, I'm surprised you're still in any kind of clothes. Did I get ugly while you were gone or something?" Her grin hadn't faded. In fact, it was only getting more pronounced by the moment. And the eyeing she was giving him was a vast departure from just 'friendly'.

[neopanther]

P’nset felt her hands lift to his cheeks, her lips press to his, far too swift. His hands jerked as though to push her away, but she was gone. His jaw hung slack, his eyes wide, brows knitting together for a moment. Confusion of a completely different sort, filling his mind in place of what had been before. Her words seemed like they came from a dazed daydream. Nonsensical, rubbish, utter toffee. Whatever synonym he used it did not cease but to understate the flooring of sheer confound-ment that she just forced upon him.

Sarjenth!? he called out in a mental panic. The brown had been flying out in the bowl, picking off a few tasty herdbeast, gorging himself as his bonded stood floored by this one swift movement.

Something about biased, leathers, then about her being ugly.
“What? No, uh... what?” He said. Sincerely grateful all of a sudden for the rich colour of his skin that did not show a trace of his embarrassment. Embarrassed, confused, confounded, astounded. How was he supposed to cope with this?! J’fel could have warned him! Shards to it all! The brown rider cursed vehemently to himself, not realising he was swearing aloud in Noestecan as he did this.

[Eideen]

To the woman's credit, she stood the cursing without batting a lash. His bumbled negatory to her being ugly put a twitch of a smile on her lips, and when he began cursing, it grew even wider. When the cursing had begun to peter off, the woman's head was thrown back and a peel of wild laughter rose up to the ceiling. Feet kicking in almost childish glee, Eideen wiped an imaginary tear from her cheek and gave P'nset a look best described as "fond".

"You know you /did/ promise to teach me some of that. Still waiting on that promise to be fulfilled, I might add, but that's for later." Her next words saw her tone softened, her smile turned shy and, daresay, sweet. "I've missed you. This place's been lonely and cold without you in it, and while I don't much miss your beastly snoring, holding onto pillows while I sleep just isn't the same."

She looked away, then; staring out into the weyrspace as Daikalveth entered and slowly strutted her way to the weyrcouch and curled on what had come to be 'her side'. The other half, the larger half, looked to be Sarjenth-sized, at the very least.

"'M not going to ask where you were. Mostly because I don't care, and partly because it's irrelevant. You're back now, and that's what matters." Green eyes slid sideways to give the man a peripheral stare. "I am going to ask why it is that you're still dressed. Aren't I supposed to be reminding you that I know where you sleep?"

[neopanther]

Her laughter shook his confusion and brought him back to the daunting reality he seemed to face. Ignoring her comment and her bravado, there was but one thing that disturbed him slightly, her fond looks. That one was followed by another in short succession, he agreed to teach her Noestecan? He hardly believed that,
“You would never learn Noestecan, I wouldn’t have agreed to such.” No Plantado turned rider or otherwise knew their tongue. If they did they were few and far between. He did not intend to let her learn it. His tone was very matter of fact.

Lonely and cold!? That was him! How could it be so without him there! Shards butt this all sounded very much like she was his weyrmate now that Was a preposterous idea. He smirked, amusement lined his older face, her green eyes upon him.
The thing that confirmed this; was the fact that Daiklaveth came to the couch, Sarjenth’s couch, and curled herself upon it, waiting for the brown to fill the gap that remained. He shuddered involuntarily, as though someone had walked over his grave. He was close to losing the plot. Part of his mind told him to leave the weyr, run as fast as he could, to J’fel, ask the man what on Pern was going on around here.

Her next question nailed him in place. Fear in part.
“Why... am... I dressed?” He certainly remembered their conversation earlier. But he had not even begun to think of what he said like that. Furious blushing resumed, his face heated like a roaring fire, “I eh... ehm. Mmm” He trailed off, eyes averting from anywhere near her piercing green eyes. His inability to find a response made him incredibly edgy.

This must be a dream, there is no way this is my Pern.
What is it? What confounds you.
We seem to be partnered.
Yes, obviously we have been since I hatched, you are mine and I yours, partners. If you would call it such.
No, Sarjenth. Do you remember that green rider, the female who claimed to be in our wing?
How could I forget, her green is quite charming.
Well she is also in our weyr, and that charming green is sharing your couch. He felt a sudden urgency rise in the brown, Sarjenth discarded the last of his meal, and began towards their weyr. As though the dragon could not believe the words his partner told him.
But I have caught no green.

[Eideen]

The sheer abruptness of his tone, on speaking of his language, caught him a look of softened shock from the greenrider. "Your memory really is faulty, isn't it? You did so agree to it, and I remember the exact afternoon, in fact. If you like, I'll have Daikalveth relay it to you through your Sarjenth, but.. you did agree." The last part was stressed gently, and her features had lost a bit of their warmth. Green eyes were pinned on his face, and even Daikalveth's began to whirl with mild distress. Bleed off from her rider.

The silence that hung about them while he spoke with his brown was unpleasant for the greenrider, that much was evident in the waning of her grin. Her gaze turned back, seeking the minty green that had taken to staring at the brownrider. Facets whirled between green and yellow in a slow pulsing. It was not to her rider that she called, but to the brown instead.

Mine is unhappy. She announced grouchily into Sarjenth's head. The general insinuation sent along with that statement was a subtle, unspoken 'Do something about it'.

[neopanther]

Panic stricken, P’nset tried to cover his tracks. His mind faltered at how to do so. “No no, it’s not necessary.” He stammered for a moment, referring unto her need to have Daikalveth relay the memory. He sighed and restarted his sentence with a little more confidence. “My memory is faulty – yes, during our trip, I took a substantial blow to the head, no physical damage shows, but part of my long term memory seems to have been affected, I did not wish to worry you.” He lied through his back teeth, but it was the only thing he could think of that could possibly explain the reason he did not know what was going on about him.

Sarjenth’s presence was announced by a swift and harsh gust of wind blowing about the inner of the weyr as he back-winged, and descended to the ledge with a heavy thump.
It is a shame, I think I would have liked to remember catching such as this dainty thing. Unsure as to whether to be more marts shocked or appalled, P’nset grit his teeth and decided there was but one way to cover his tracks completely.

Well do not bet on it happening again Sarjenth, this is not for us. I cannot share this, our life.
He took his weight slowly, and tentatively from the back of the arm chair, with awkward movements he took towards where the green eyed woman stood. He tilted his head slightly lower as to get a good look in her eyes – he had seen others do such things. He hesitated for a moment before he slipped his arms about her waist. He felt awkward, clunky. Out of place and totally alien in this environment, his body seemed to boil hot with the pure livid embarrassment this seemed to cause him.

Forgive him, P’nset is not himself, the trip has had us segregated for quite some time. He conveyed to Daikalveth as sweetly as possible, though it was not hard to be sweet to such an endearing creature. And he did not lie per se. Until the trip, they were very segregated. And P’nset was very much alone during and before the trip, Sarjenth just left ambiguity towards the latter part.

[Eideen]

Whatever thoughts had brewed behind the woman's eyes, they did not leave a very pleasant after-image. It was several moments of heavy silence - after the announcement of his injury and loss of memory - before she stood. Her posture had become closed, and the speaking of his wish had her gaze returning to his face. It was a dangerous thing, that stare. But it softened. The wall she'd put up was removed and instead of angry words, she said in their place, "I thought something was wrong." Even in the face of unhappy news, her tone could not help but sound slightly triumphant. But it was clear that, in that moment, her victory was without joy.

The brown's presence stole Daikalveth's gaze away from the man. The undecisiveness of her green-gold gaze was instantly set to a guiltily happy blue that flashed briefly.

Eideen remained where she stood, letting P'nset do the moving he saw necessary. With the cold reception he'd given her, it was clear his next choice of contact was something of a surprise for her. But it also provided a break in the tension. The woman's body gave its rigidness away to an almost relieved lean. With his arms about her, Eideen leaned closer and slowly pushed her fingers into his hair on either side of his head, pulling his sights down where she could look at him better. He had a good quarter-foot in height on her, and that fact still stuck in her craw - made evident by the slight lift of her heels off the weyr floor. "You worried me in another way. I'd thought.." She chewed at her lower lip momentarily, the thought incomplete out of the gate. Head shook, she simply pressed her forehead to his and let out a quiet sigh. "I missed you, is all. We don't have to do or talk about anything. I can fix you something hot to drink, if you want."

She understands, now. It is like before, back when we were new, she says. He is.. unsure, she thinks. She worries. The green relayed to Sarjenth, wings rustled open and closed again, but not before one brushes the space beside her in invitation. This space is empty. You should fill it.

[neopanther]

Sarjenth’s lumbering gait revealed itself as he walked over towards her, folding back his wings with a sound akin to dry parchment. He did as the green – rather, his green - asked of him, he walked towards his couch, Sarjenth’s long, rich brown form became a crescent about hers. His hide’s colouring was rich and dark in every way that hers was pastel and pure. He felt comfortable there, settling down to share in her warmth, an alien, but welcome sensation. Sarjenth was almost more logical and less rigid than his bond.

Speaking of rigid, that that ebbed from Eideen, absorbed into P’nset. He stiffened slowly as she diminished the proximity between them. Shards how close were they?! The feeling of her fingers in his hair, her forehead pressed against his, her impossibly green eyes meeting his own, an unforgiving cipher-like gaze that held some semblance of kindness that made him feel naught but weak. “I’m not thirsty thank you,” He was very unused to having someone tend to him. He was independent all his life. This life that was. The other him must not have been so. Gah! This was confusing!

He let his brow crease for a moment as he picked her up on what she had said, “You thought what?” He pried. Relaxing a little, he bent his arms about her so they enveloped her more, hands resting (with incredibly warm palms as a side effect of his frightful nerves) against her sides.

Well you don’t seem to be holding back too much.[/i] A metnal note of disdain was given to his bonded.
If I do, she will suspect! It is a catch twenty-two situation Sarjenth, if I don’t uphold my side off this lie, I will be carted off to the south, and left there as a madman.
Which is ridiculous considering I could fly you back at any given moment. Sarjenth pointed out, Just see if you can enjoy it. Is it so bad to be companioned? The brown prodded his bonded in the right direction with his thoughts. P’nset gave a mental groan of his disapproval.

It is, perhaps too much like when they first met, though, I think mine knows less of her now than what he did then, the blow he took was substantial, and I did not feel like it should be me who reminded him of such things. He informed Daikalveth. Much more adept at keeping up an act than his bond.She worries with due cause! P’nset is not quite himself, it worries me also, but Aleda assured us that there will be no lasting damage, save for a few memories rotten from his mind.

[Eideen]

The brown's presence was an instant comfort for the green, and her head swung close, nose smoothing under his chin to the chorus of a throaty croon. Cheekily, the green shot a look over at Sarjenth's rider, mirth twinkled in the whirl of her facets. 'See, like this', she seemed to indicate, before ignoring the human pair in favor of attending to her brown.

"You've gone and injured yourself and you still won't let me dote on you. Stubborn ol' goat." The last was muttered softly between smiling lips that tilted up and deposited a chaste kiss to the creases of the man's forehead. His question took her for yet another whirl - he called her on her unfinished thought. A faint, pinkish blush curled upon her pale cheeks a moment before her eyes strayed away from his. She gave up the attempt at seeming taller, and slowly shrank down until her heels touched the cool stone of the weyr floor. Then, her head rested against his chest and she huffed a sigh that sounded both resigned and petulent in the same instant.

"I'm not sure." She said, then. And then a laugh, mostly at herself. "I thought for a moment you'd.. well. Changed your mind. About.. us." Her fingers played in the scraggly ends of his hair a moment, before they slid down to rest palms against his chest. The woman lifted her head and looked up at him again. "S'pose that's just me being paranoid. You hit your head. Is there anything you will let me do for you?"

I will refrain from passing on the idea that memory of Mine is rotten. It will be safer for yours that way. The green teased, chucking Sarjenth beneath the chin with the tip of her nose before resettling. This will frustrate her. To be forgotten. Especially with all that has happened before.

[neopanther]

“Hardly!” P’nset announced – smile playing on his lips that he didn’t even notice. He smirked, then that soon faded, “Goat?” He questioned before shaking his head, one hand making bristled noises at the rough – but short stubble that had formed, “I do not have the beard for that mountain creature, and besides I don’t let anyone dote on me Eideen, you know that.” He said with a queer smirk. One that he was totally not used to. He let the hint of amusement fade as she blushed faintly and talked of not wanting them to be together. “It certainly puts us in an awkward position within Frost. Most Wingleaders don’t like internal wing affairs,” He was referring to his knowledge for men within the wing, generally it made them attached towards something, and if they heard, or felt one of their wing fall or injured, it tended to distract them, thus was the reasoning. “But that doesn’t affect us – certainly for now – with B’nek away.” He smirked as he let his hands drift to her hips, she felt firm and yet abstract beneath his hands.

He flinched slightly as she played with his hair, He caught the look from Daikalveth, and he just couldn’t quite comprehend it all, so in a moment of weakness, her hands upon his chest, his heart beating irratically, he released Eideen – slowly, not as though he were disgusted by the thought, but rather rhe let his hands drift over the lower off her arms as he pulled away, he tried to convey it as ‘natural’ but likely it came across as awkward. He took three steps from her, long stride with a loping gate, “and no, there’s nothing you can do for me. Except...” He paused, turning towards her again. “Except, from the bump on my head, there’s a lot in my mind that is... not right, it’s fuzzy. Abstract, the memories are not as they should be. Aleda said that would happen, but, if you could... provide clarity...” He said as he sunk into the sofa, remaining forward facing.

Ah, but Daikalveth you seem to forget, the sweetest of Benden wine comes from the ‘spoiled’ vine. He crooned softly as he spoke to her, It is not that he chose to forget, his memory loss is even impacting upon me, it is rather strong, parts of my memory seem to have lapsed into his rotten side. Sarjenth said with a jovial tone, much more so than necessary for the decidedly grim conversation, Surely yours would be fine to learn that he can no longer remember, for he did not select to forget. Would she not delight i n reminding him of his foolery? Sarjenth rumbled with his mirth, he was sure he would like to hear the tales behind how they – that was their bondeds – had gotten ‘together’ to become an ‘item’ as the humans put it. Sarjenth twined his tail with hers, crossing one of his forelegs over hers, crooned so softly it was almost like a purr.

[Eideen]

"Yes, and I'm still trying to break you of that habit." She chuckled, and then quirked a brow at the man. "You know better. Work is work. The wing comes first for both of us, and duty prevails. When we're here, though, and there's no call for us for duty or drill, not even B'nek can b'grudge us this." The hands at her hips called forth a light smile, only too soon faded when he drew away. There was understanding in her stare for him, but it was also colored with a gray forlesing. After a moment, she sank into the chair opposite him and took a breath.

"Clarity." Eid repeated, licking her lips to chase the dryness away. She sat back and closed her eyes to the space they occupied, and she seemed to draw inward, into her own thoughts a while. "Where should I begin?" She asked then, lips moving minimally, and eyes still shut in a natural way. "How much was lost?"

Not all tongues that taste wine care for the flavor. The minty-hued dragon responded, her thoughts threaded with background distraction from a conversation between herself and her rider. They were discussing, and Daikalveth's subtle detachment of full attention to Sarjenth gave that away. She remembers. All of it. She is remembering. There is much, and some things still.. She lacked the words, and instead shared the sensation with the brown. It's heavy, like the weight of many stones carrying something down into the vast depths of an ocean. Does yours truly wish to hear?

[neopanther]

Nodding slowly he conceded the point. no matter whether it was this Pern or another, he would always put his responsibilities before everything else. That would not be something that changed for him. he watched her smile fade. It was as though the room was sad with her.
"Clarity" he confirmed, the third time the word was repeated between them. He spoke softly, as though trying to reassure her, "I don't not remember anything, I remember ... most... but there are gaps, and the best part of my memories are hazy. It is unfortunate, but I have to ask." He shook his head solemnly, he didn't like lying. He did not like it in the slightest. However. It was necessary, he could not tell her what had happened, as before he would be carted away like a mad man.
"I'm sorry if I am not the man you partnered, but misfortune has its way's of catching up to me. It feels as though the only thing I have been permitted was Sarjenth." which was true. Everything he had, came with a proportional downside.
Sarjenth cooed softly, despite the fact as such a large dragon it came out less comforting, perhaps a tad aggressive - but the tone of his voice echoed only his concordance.
but most can appreciate the flavour. Mine would hate to have to stand before her and not be able to know. It would hurt him not knowing. I know it must hurt yours to know he doesn't know her as he should, and did. But fate is cruel, and it is either now, or another time, The brown crooned softly to the end, trying to indicate that he wanted the best for them all. The sensation she portrayed to him was that of a burden. A weight shared is a weight halved Daikalveth He added with a certain wisdom.